Recently, I’ve been getting a lot of private Facebook messages from baby lesbians who are freshly out of the closet and asking me all kinds of questions:“How do I date girls? I will never forget how terrified I was when I first realized I wanted to exclusively swim in the girl pond. I exerted zero effort into attracting boy creatures, but I learned quickly that I didn’t really need to.
It can feel wildly intimidating to be a little, vulnerable kitten tossed into a teeming cesspool of seasoned dykes.
When it comes to dating, all the rules in the book fly right out the window when you meet the perfect plus one.
But until then, it can seem like a revolving door of rejects until your find your Mr. Luckily, there are a few guidelines that every smart gay man should keep in mind to always stay on top of his game and out of a dead-end relationship. This is a sure fire way to fall in love with the idea of him before getting to know him at all.
As the pivotal moment approaches, thoughts can become centered on such questions as: “Will he like me? There’s no template to follow and we were never taught how to flirt with and date other men. How do two men join together in the “courtship dance?
” While a lack of rules for gay dating can be a positive thing, lending to more creativity, spontaneity, and individuality, it can also create anxiety and a sense of “cluelessness” in how to meet and date successfully—kind of like a car without a driver.
You may just be screwing yourself into hanging out with someone that you aren’t really that into because your buddy invited him to his birthday party or your best girlfriend wants him to come to have a drink.
To be safe, just keep it between the two of you until you are sure he’s a keeper.
Almost all of my regrets come from the things I didn’t do, not the things I did.
Plus you may want to save some things to talk about just in case you run into the dreaded awkward silence. So if you bring a new beau around your gaggle before it’s the right time, the side of you that he sees may surprise him.
Or worse, what if he absolutely loves your friends and the feeling is mutual?
It was nearing the end of the night at this time so I was pretty secluded from everyone.
A man walked up to me who I hadn’t seen before and nervously said “what’s your name? ” He said “Shane, I just wanted to let you know that I have noticed you all night.